How to Unlock Your Presence & Gravitas as a Modern Head Coach
Some head coaches change the atmosphere the second they step into the rink.
Hey Coach!
Some head coaches change the atmosphere the second they step into the rink.
The energy shifts. Conversations quiet. Players sit up straighter.
That’s presence.
And in elite sport, presence is as critical as any system you’ll ever draw on a whiteboard.
Watch the video version on YouTube HERE
Why Presence Beats Volume
When a head coach first took on the role, they often thought they had to act the part.
Be loud. Project authority. Control every moment.
But here’s the truth: my composure — the thing people came to know me for — wasn’t natural. They had to learn it.
They work with presentation coaches. They learn how to breathe, how to slow down, and how to use silence so people lean in.
They study great speakers — not just what they said, but how they held a room. The pauses. The posture. The control of breath.
Presence wasn’t a gift. It was a skill. And like any skill, it can be learned.
The Misunderstood Link Between Presence and Charisma
A lot of coaches think presence is the same as charisma. It isn’t.
I’ve met plenty of “charismatic” coaches who could light up a room but couldn’t hold it together in the third period of a playoff game.
Charisma can be turned on and off. Presence is constant.
It’s built on authenticity — being comfortable in your own skin, regardless of the stage or the stakes.
Nelson Mandela had it, he didn't have physical stature or theatrics. Mandela could walk into a room and command it before speaking.
In hockey, think Scotty Bowman — small in stature, enormous in influence. Jon Cooper — measured, articulate, never rushed. Herb Brooks — who could stand in front of a group of college kids and convince them they could beat the Soviet Union.
Presence in the Coaching Arena
1. Delivering the Game Plan
Your players are reading you before they hear you. If you walk into the pre-game meeting with nervous energy — fidgeting, rushing your words — you’ve already undermined the message.
Patsy drilled into me: “Breathe before you speak. Let them come to you.”
When you speak, talk on the breath — it slows your delivery and gives your words weight.
Herb Brooks mastered this. Players didn’t just hear his speeches — they felt them.
2. On the Bench
A bench can be chaos: noise, adrenaline, bad calls, momentum swings.
The players look to you for the emotional temperature.
If you match their panic, you’ll amplify it.
If you hold steady — physically still, voice controlled — you become the anchor.
Scotty Bowman was famous for this. Rarely animated, but when he spoke, the bench listened. His stillness in the storm told the team: We’re fine. Stick to the plan.
3. In the Locker Room
Between periods or after a poor performance, your presence is tested.
Gravitas here isn’t about always being calm. It’s about knowing which energy the moment needs. Sometimes that’s measured words; sometimes it’s a short, sharp jolt.
Mike Babcock used silence as a weapon. He’d stand in the middle of the room, scan the team, and say nothing until every player was focused. The quiet was often more powerful than any speech.
4. Running Practice
Presence shows in the details.
If you slouch through drills, players pick it up.
If you demonstrate precision, clarity, and intent, you model the standard.
Jon Cooper is known for using practice to set tone. No wasted reps. No casual explanations. Everything is an opportunity to reinforce identity.
5. Mentoring 1:1
One-on-one is where presence becomes deeply personal.
A player should feel like the only person in your world in that moment.
That means:
Phone down.
Shoulders square.
Listening to both words and emotion.
The best 1:1 coaches are patient. They know when to hold silence so a player will fill it with what’s really on their mind.
The Vulnerability Factor
Here’s a metaphor I use in workshops:
Imagine having a dream where you are walking into a crowded dressing room completely naked.
In one scenario, you’re anxious, hiding, scanning for escape routes. In the other, you’re comfortable, shaking hands, talking to people, unfazed.
That second version? That’s presence.
It’s not about literal nudity — it’s about being so secure in yourself that nothing rattles you.
No armour. No false bravado.
Players can sense when you’re authentic. And authenticity is the fastest way to earn trust.
Owning the Room: Lessons from Al Pacino
There’s a reason Al Pacino’s “Inches” speech in Any Given Sunday is one of the most quoted sports movie scenes of all time.
It’s not just the words — it’s the way he holds the team.
Pacino doesn’t pace frantically. He doesn’t shout from the first second. He starts low, slow, almost uncertain… and builds.
That build is intentional.
By starting small, he forces the room to lean in. As the emotion rises, the players are already with him — ready to go anywhere he takes them.
Great head coaches do the same in real life. They:
Control the pace so the room moves with them.
Allow pauses so the words land.
Match their body language to the message — grounded, steady, committed.
When you deliver a game plan, rally a bench, or reset a locker room, think less about “firing them up” and more about pulling them in.
Presence isn’t about starting at full volume. It’s about building to a point where the team is hanging on every word.
How to Build It
Presence can be trained. Here are tools I use with head coaches:
1. Breathe Low and Slow
Place your hand on your stomach, over your belly button, breathe through your nose, so your hand moves out. This relaxes you, deepens your voice, and slows your pace.
Do it before games, media, or difficult conversations.
2. Talk on the Breath
Inhale, then speak as you exhale. It makes you harder to interrupt, keeps your rhythm steady, and projects confidence.
3. Neutral Posture
Hands by your side. No pocketing, no crossing arms. It’s open without being aggressive. Try it at practice, in meetings, even in public settings.
4. Study the Greats
I watched speakers like Barack Obama, Denzel Washington, and Margaret Thatcher — not for what they said, but how they delivered it. The pauses, the breathing, the way they filled a space.
5. Practice in Real Life
Walk into a restaurant or conference, pause, breathe out, scan the room. Hold your space without puffing up or shrinking.
When You Don’t Have It
Without presence, players stop hearing you — even if you’re talking.
Your bench rides the same emotional rollercoaster as the scoreboard.
The locker room leadership defaults to others.
When You Do Have It
With presence, you:
Command attention without demanding it.
Influence without over-talking.
Set the emotional tone for your team.
Deliver messages that stick under pressure.
Presence won’t win you games on its own. But without it, you’ll never get the full potential out of your systems, your staff, or your players.
Final thought:
Composure doesn’t come from talent. It comes from learning, practising, and failing in front of rooms full of people — then getting better.
If they can develop presence, so can you.
And when you do, you’ll lead far beyond tactics — in the locker room, on the bench, at practice, and in every 1:1.
Listen to the training via the Team Head Coach audiobook HERE